...ME
Su aka Stellvia
I'm just another bossy person who thinks that the world is solely mine... LOL.. if only..
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Haha.. I've change the picture tho..
Thursday, July 22, 2004
Dear Bloggie,
I am getting scare now.. Somehow, my heart is triggering an alert again.. The pain is back. I have no idea why, I thought it's already back to normal. The stress i am having, the diet program that i am on might have cause it too.. I really feel so stressful.. I wonder if i am ever going to make it through this month.
Everytime when the pain comes.. it always remind me of the time my dad and grandma spend in the hospital, the pain, the sorrow, the expenses and the after-operation effects... I don't wanna be like them. I am already trying to slim down, excerising regularly.. but why does this pain always come back. It hurts... I wonder when it will snap... and then maybe it will just end.. But, I can't leave my family now.. They can't survive without me, I do love them so much..
I been trying to get away from my home lately.. somehow going back, seems sad to me.. I love to stay with them, but i am so scare to see them... I dun understand why? I didn't do anything wrong.. I just love them too much to see then suffering now.. It aches to see how hard my mom is working, how sad my dad is... I have feelin, I can feel it even if they dun tell me.. And it hurts knowing that i can't do anything about it..
My boss is closing down the business, if i am not wrong, he hopes that i can get a job by end of this month. But, who in the hell can find a nice and suitable permantent job in less then 2 weeks time? When I wanna leave, he ask me to stay, and when I stay, he wanna me to find a new job.. WTH~! How am i suppose to do that? My job opportunity has gone.. And the vacancy is already taken.. Now, he tell me that i can hop over to my new job. I should have went for that interview~! So what am i suppose to do now? Am I suppose to tell him that i need one more month when he is like desperately hoping that i can find a new job asap. Okay, I am getting stress out again.
Can someone take that pain away? Pls.... Onegaishimasu......
There are only two types of person, those who likes Su's kompeito and those who don't. # ;